【the eroticization of gender】

You,the eroticization of gender and all socially aware people, are probably familiar with what Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen deem acceptable to put in their multi-million-dollar industry bodies, and strawberries are certainly not on that list.

But Brady insists that it's easy to keep his body pure of the devil's delicacy, because he has never marred his tongue with the forbidden fruit and therefore cannot crave it.

“I’ve never eaten a strawberry in my life. I have no desire to do that,” he informed The Cut. “Absolutely not.”

It seems suspicious that Brady can recall everything he's ever eaten, including the snacks of his youth, but alright. Even if he's merely a born again strawberry virgin, the quarterback is certainly committed. He has also, apparently, never had coffee. Brady also once said that he never deflated certain footballs, so it's important to keep an open mind here.

Avoiding foods he's consciously eaten before presents a different challenge, but fortunately, Brady has a lot of time to devote to not eating cheeseburgers following his temporary suspension from the NFL.

“Do you need to eat a cheeseburger every day to realize that you love a cheeseburger?” he inquired. "Or could you eat it once a week … or once every two weeks … or once a month … or once every two months?”

See, Brady's devotion is too pure to be tested, but using that logic, couldn't he eat one strawberry and hold it in his heart forever?

It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

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