Trump's Sharpie-written notes are Seinfeld Porn Parodya tragically catchy pop punk song now.
U.S. Ambassador to the European Union Gordon Sondland gave a damning testimony against Donald Trump during Wednesday's impeachment hearing. He claimed that the Trump administration, including the president, was aware of quid pro quo in Ukraine.
The president, meanwhile, took to the White House lawn to reiterate once again that he had done anything wrong. Photographs of his notes from the appearance show the words "I WANT NOTHING. I WANT NOTHING. I WANT NO QUID PRO QUO" scrawled on a pad in what appears to be marker.
It was only a matter of time before someone turned his bizarre statement into a song.
Musician Nick Lutsko, who has turned the president's speeches into pop punk ballads before, reworked the now-infamous Sharpie statement into an emo song worthy of the most angsty hair flips.
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Honestly, it kind of slaps. If Warped Tour still happened, this would be the song to open the pit.
It also inspired these horrifying renderings of what emo Trump would look like.
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If you want to subject yourself to ten minutes of emo Trump's whining, Lutsko also made a medley of his speeches-turned-pop punk songs.
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The Only Untranslatable American Writer by Brian Evenson
How to Imitate George Saunders by Benjamin Nugent
Redux: So Much Loneliness in That Gold by The Paris Review
One Word: Bitch by Danez Smith
Redefining the Black Mountain Poets by Jonathan C. Creasy
The Exceptional Dovey Johnson Roundtree by Tayari Jones
More UFOs Than Ever Before by Rich Cohen
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