【Bad Detective: Food Chain [Uncut]】

If you were a bored child or Bad Detective: Food Chain [Uncut]middle-aged adult in the '90s looking for a quick consumerist high, there was one show you could count on: Supermarket Sweep.

It's been a long time since Americans watched people haggle over pork butts (the show went off the air in 2003), but now we have hope. On Thursday, production company Freemantle Media announced that they had acquired global rights to the show with the intent to bring it back. Then they encouraged people to "go wild in the aisles."

(FYI: If you're going to win Supermarket Sweep, you shouldn't go wild in the aisles but instead have a scheduled plan. Consider taking a minute to pour out a $100 coffee or grabbing a few delightful holiday hams).

To be clear, this doesn't mean the show will actually be produced. It still has to find a channel, sponsors, etc.

Sigh. If you haven't seen Supermarket Sweepand don't understand the fetishism, let me explain. The show, which peaked on Lifetime in the '90s, featured supermarket-savvy contestants showing off their brand knowledge and fighting in the aisles to determine who could buy the most expensive garbage, the quickest.

It really was the best capitalism had to offer, and I miss it every day.

And since we're low on good news nowadays, I encourage the internet to do everything it can to take this possibility and turn it into a cold hard fact. Twitter is uniquely adept at making dumb stuff a reality. We're gonna need everyone to step up and start spreading rumors, fast.

Shoppers, get your carts ready, even if it's years in advance.

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